Effective Networking - Doing It Like A Pro

First impressions count, making those few moments it takes to form an impression so important. So how we conduct ourselves when networking is key to building solid and long-term relationships. If we get it wrong, in those first few minutes when we speak to a new person for the first time, we could lose the chance to ever work with them or benefit from building a relationship with them. Learning the disciplines that lead us to become effective at networking is, therefore, a no-brainer. 

Today's episode is part 3 of our Effective Networking Series. This episode discusses the four professional networking disciplines we should all know before engaging in networking activities. The disciplines are:

1. Researching your opportunities,
2. Identifying your targets,
3. Finding alignment with your targets, and
4. Following-up.

The topics we cover in this episode are: 

• Topic overview, Doing Networking
• Researching your networking opportunities
• Identifying your targets
• Finding alignment with your targets
• Follow up

Adapt_CO
Helping businesses find their new shape.

SA Business Builders
Business leaders social group based in South Australia

Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.

Transcript

Brenton Gowland: 0:01

Today on The Business Builders podcast, we're continuing our series about effective networking and exploring how to go about doing it like a pro. So in this episode, we discuss the four professional networking disciplines and they are researching your opportunities, identifying your targets, finding alignment with your targets, and following up. Well, welcome to the Business Builders podcast. We are your hosts, I am Brenton Gowland.

Ron Tomlian: 0:26

And I'm Ron Tomlian.

Brenton Gowland: 0:28

And it's starting to get towards event season Ron.

Ron Tomlian: 0:31

It is indeed and yes, I'm, we're starting to see more things happening.

Brenton Gowland: 0:36

Yeah.

Ron Tomlian: 0:36

We had an all TEC Day at Ayers House the other day.

Brenton Gowland: 0:39

What is an all TEC day for those of us who are not initiated.

Ron Tomlian: 0:42

Okay, so all the TEC groups in South Australia get together. And we had a couple of speakers. And it was all about networking as well.

Brenton Gowland: 0:50

Well, that's good. And just one more clarification question, because we've gone through the stats of our podcast recently, and really happy to say we've got people from about 80 different countries listening, and that blows my mind. But some of those people, some of us who are listening might not know what TEC stands for what is TEC

Ron Tomlian: 1:07

TEC, The Executive Connection in Australia, it's got different names in different countries, Vistage in the United States. It's all about groups of CEOs who get together and talk about their issues on a regular basis.

Brenton Gowland: 1:20

Great. Okay. So you all came together and had an all in TEC day where people networked and so forth?

Ron Tomlian: 1:25

Yeah. And talking about the economy and various perspectives on the economy. It's good to hear different people give their perspective, because it's pretty clear that at the moment, there's a lot of uncertainty out there. And getting different perspectives gives you a better handle on the how much uncertainty there really is. And I suppose prepares people for dealing with that uncertainty.

Brenton Gowland: 1:50

And that recession word is being bandied around all around the world. So the US that recession word is quite, quite loud over there. It's not so loud in Australia at the moment.

Ron Tomlian: 1:59

No, as the old saying goes, when America sneezes, we get a cold, it will have a flow on effect. And you know, for any anyone who thinks, in my opinion, that we got through COVID, and everything's gonna be sweet, because you know, we handled it well. There's gonna be consequences. And we're living with those consequences now. And it's not uncommon.

Brenton Gowland: 2:20

Yeah.

Ron Tomlian: 2:20

To think that things are gonna go down for a little while.

Brenton Gowland: 2:22

And that's why it's so important to make sure that we're really on top of things like networking. I remember, I've read this book, and I can't remember who it's by at the moment. It's called Dig Your Well Before You're Thirsty. I'll look up who that is. But you can Google that. And it's a book about building your network before you need it.

Ron Tomlian: 2:41

Absolutely right.

Brenton Gowland: 2:42

And I think at times like this, when the uncertainty is so high, it's your network that is massively important. As you all know, we're on Episode Three here today of effective networking series. And I think it just really does, again, highlight the need to get out to build your network to build strong relationships, because that's how we get through hard times.

Ron Tomlian: 3:03

That's right. That's the whole idea behind those tech groups that I was talking about. I often describe them as insurance policies for the hard times.

Brenton Gowland: 3:12

Yeah, that's good. I like that.

Ron Tomlian: 3:14

Investing in your support network for when things get tough.

Brenton Gowland: 3:18

Yep, dig your well before you're thirsty, insurance policy for the hard times. It's all good. And as we come towards Christmas, as we know, we're going to have more and more parties, networking events, end of year functions, and they're all networking opportunities. Last night, I was at the Defence Teaming Centre gala dinner. 800 people and the tuxedos are starting to come out again, black tie events. Always wear them for about two months a year like but number of events, and then it's back on the shelf.

Ron Tomlian: 3:45

Well, they get put back in mothballs for a little while.

Brenton Gowland: 3:48

But anyway, we digress. So yes, we are absolutely getting stuck into our Effective Networking Series, episode three today. So just in review, Ron, let's just talk very quickly, what have we done so far?

Ron Tomlian: 4:03

So far, we've looked at the purpose, why are you doing networking and having a good understanding of the activities that you're going to do.

Brenton Gowland: 4:10

So defining why your networking.

Ron Tomlian: 4:12

Yeah, absolutely. Understanding your why. Planning.

Brenton Gowland: 4:15

Yes.

Ron Tomlian: 4:16

And that's all about being able to map your network and the various networks that you have. Scheduling activities and events in that preparing for the networking that you're going to be doing in terms of things like elevator pitch, your mindset, your materials, like business cards.

Brenton Gowland: 4:33

And that was our last Episode, Episode 31 that we discussed that.

Ron Tomlian: 4:37

Snd then actually putting time in your diary to do this stuff.

Brenton Gowland: 4:40

Scheduling. Very important and actually developing a calendar of activity.

Ron Tomlian: 4:44

Yep, absolutely. So today, it's all about the doing.

Brenton Gowland: 4:48

I like it. So before we get stuck into the doing, let's get stuck into our sponsors. So our sponsors are.

Ron Tomlian: 4:56

SA Business Builders and a group of people get together and do what we call genuine networking, which is about developing long term relationships and getting to know each other and being genuinely curious.

Brenton Gowland: 5:10

Yeah. And so again, if you listening for the first time, what we mean by that is SA Business Builders, obviously, it's a group in South Australia. So our international listeners, well, there will be networking events in your area, and we encourage you to get involved. But this particular networking event, has no structure, has no speakers, it's just good people getting together, same time, same place. And we've got a bunch of hosts who run around, just make sure everyone's talking to everyone. And they're really good times. It's just really genuine, getting to know you sessions and aligning on things that are important. And sometimes people work together. But sometimes people just need an ear.

Ron Tomlian: 5:47

And that's about having a support network for when things are good. And when they're not so good.

Brenton Gowland: 5:53

Correct. And then we've got Adapt_CO.

Ron Tomlian: 5:55

That's you.

Brenton Gowland: 5:56

And I'm learning more and more. So I go into companies, and I basically help them get unstuck and change. And I do that through the application of marketing and business strategy services. But I'm learning more and more that it's about helping leaders make the transition into change, because if a business is going to change, that leader at the top really has to change because then the business itself can follow. And so I'm learning more and more that the service that I provide is helping those business leaders make those changes in their business by making changes in themselves.

Ron Tomlian: 6:26

So very important.

Brenton Gowland: 6:27

It is and that's our sponsors for this week, SA Business Builders and Adapt_CO. So, onto our topic. So today we're doing the doing Ron. Do you want to give us just before we get cracking, so people know exactly what we're doing. No pun intended, a bit of an overview for what we're going to be speaking about.

Ron Tomlian: 6:47

Okay, so in trying to get the doing into a sort of framework, we've come up with four activities that are associated with the doing.

Brenton Gowland: 6:57

Good.

Ron Tomlian: 6:57

Number one, Research, number two, Targeting number three, Alignment, and number four, Follow-up.

Brenton Gowland: 7:05

So Research, Target, Align and Follow-up.

Ron Tomlian: 7:08

That's right.

Brenton Gowland: 7:09

I like it. I like that, you know, we've come up with a few of these little things to make it easier. It's like the ROYGBIV. You remember that?

Ron Tomlian: 7:15

Oh, Yeah, absolutely.

Brenton Gowland: 7:17

From school. What does it stand for? ROYGBIV? Red, orange...

Ron Tomlian: 7:20

Yellow, blue, indigo Violet.

Brenton Gowland: 7:22

Yep. So in this particular case, it's RTAF.

Ron Tomlian: 7:25

Oh, wow. I never thought of that. AFU.

Brenton Gowland: 7:28

Yeah, true. No Research, Target, Align and Follow up. And look, it's really important. So if we get stuck into this, if you've just done the whole mapping and planning, so what we spoke about last episode was the planning. Once you've got that plan in place, you're going to start going out and going to events. So you might be going to a networking event, a social event counts, doesn't it?

Ron Tomlian: 7:50

Oh absolutely going to the pub, going to sporting events, attending conferences, meetings, speakers, if you're doing a course, if you're doing your MBA, you know, there's an opportunity for networking.

Brenton Gowland: 8:01

And that's interesting in that because that means any studying you're doing. So there's a lot of business leader courses where I know that people I know have done them just so that they can rub shoulders with other CEOs. And you've got charity events...

Ron Tomlian: 8:14

Meetings within your own organisation meetings with other organisations, you'll meet new people, that's an opportunity for networking as well.

Brenton Gowland: 8:20

So there are tonnes of networking opportunities. So you've done the planning, you've got a sheduled networking activity, which could be it could actually be everything from a phone call through to as we were talking about events just then. So you start by for each of those activities, doing some research. So what that means is like, if you're going to an event, I'll give you an example. So we went to the DTC dinner last night, which means Defence Teaming Centre, and we got a list of everyone who was there, and then we got the table. So so we got a whole list. And you can get these lists if you ask.

Ron Tomlian: 8:51

If you're diligent and you do the asking, not all organisers will do that but oftentimes, they will provide everyone with a list of who's going to be there.

Brenton Gowland: 9:00

You just have to ask, often. But you can go through those lists, and then you can start to go, oh, I want to get to that person, that person, that person. You know, that's someone of interest. They're not I know what table they're in. So you've done research. And for me, that's mapping out the room, understanding who's where, understanding who I want to talk to. And there's only like, out of a room of 800. To be honest, there's only about five people I wanted to really talk to last night, but I knew exactly where they were before I went to the event. Some of them I knew already. Some of them I didn't know. And I just had a plan for who it was that I was targeting. So the very first thing is research.

Ron Tomlian: 9:37

And that research can be spontaneous as well.

Brenton Gowland: 9:40

Oh Yes.

Ron Tomlian: 9:40

I mean, you gave me an example when we were talking about this before. You go to an event might be spontaneous, and you know, one or two people there and no one else. You can go to those people and say,"Hey, listen, you know me, who should I be talking to here?" That's doing a bit of research.

Brenton Gowland: 9:57

Yeah, absolutely. And that that's always a comforting thing too because sometimes when you walk into a room full of people you don't know, finding that one person you do know is great. And just, yeah, research can be just doing it having a conversation, as you just said, and finding out if I should meet anyone in this room, who should it be, I'll introduce you to two people, Brenton or Ron, and there you go, you've done a bit of research.

Ron Tomlian: 10:18

So that leads very nicely into once you've done your research, identifying who you think you want to speak to. So having your target which should align with the purpose of your networking in the first place.

Brenton Gowland: 10:30

100%.

Ron Tomlian: 10:30

So if you're looking for, if part of your purpose of networking is to identify referrals for your business, then you know that I'm going to be looking for referrals from people who are good at referring at the event that I'm going to. So again, pulling back to I know now, who's going to be there. What's my purpose in being here? that will give me priorities for the type of people that I want to speak to.

Brenton Gowland: 10:57

Yeah, and that's exactly what the research is about too. Research, really, the outcome of the research is identifying the targets that you want to actually get to know. Because, okay, I want to win work, if that's your purpose, I want to win more work, whatever else, you might get to know those people and going, maybe not, but at least you know that I want that, I want to have a conversation with that person, that person, that person and see if there's alignment. If it's, you know, if the purpose of your network is simply furthering your ability to have relationships in your reach, then you might go to a room and go, who are some of the most connected people? How do I get to know them? And yeah, it's very important that you really well, it increases your success rate, let's say, if you actually know what you're about before you walk into the room, because random networking is okay, but you meet random people. So random networking might mean, I will meet 50 people of which three I want to talk to, and you work that out by the end of an event or you know, at some point, you have very little time to talk with those people. Sure, you might get the details, but quality of conversation at a networking event really leaves a good first impression.

Ron Tomlian: 12:05

Yeah, and I think the other thing too, is that, I don't know about you, but I've certainly been to events where you see those guys or girls, and they're moving around, and they're not spending a lot of time, they're not really that interested in anything but getting names and business cards. And yet, you tend to cringe away from those people.

Brenton Gowland: 12:24

Can be really honest with you?

Ron Tomlian: 12:25

You can.

Brenton Gowland: 12:26

It means they're lazy.

Ron Tomlian: 12:27

Yeah.

Brenton Gowland: 12:28

So because when you do see those people going to an event and they just want to swap business cards, and I kind of this is going to be terrible, but I'm going to say it. They remind me of happy little puppy dogs, "Hi, hi, my name is you know, hey, hey, you wanna swap business cards, oh, I can do this." And then you've got other personalities, which are a bit more forceful, it's lazy. And you see how the research, if you do the research, you can be much more relaxed about I'm going to talk to four people, sure other people might talk to you along the way. But you might have that as a transient conversation. And you might get something out of that and be quite surprised, but you're not actually worried about selling to this person, because you know that you want to talk to Fred, Joan, and Jennifer. And I don't really need to find out too much about anyone else. But if I do, that's a bonus. But then you're not walking through with some sort of real agenda where people are gonna to go....

Ron Tomlian: 13:18

Yeah, its about just contact rather than, its transactional, rather than relationship.

Brenton Gowland: 13:25

So that kind of networker and calling it out, identifies them as being lazy. And that attitude will flow through on how they work as well I would guarantee. If you're targeted about things...

Ron Tomlian: 13:37

And it makes, it makes it much easier, I think in terms of the next stage which is alignment, because the first step in alignment is to go in with the right mindset. And if your mindset is, I'm just going to transact a number of exchanges of business cards, that's not going to help develop relationships. But if you go in with the mindset that I'm going to be genuinely curious, you've got a much better capacity to ask good questions and want to find out about the other person, their business, their role, their background, etc.

Brenton Gowland: 14:10

So let's let's just go back then. So we've done the research, we worked out who we're going to target, we go and target those people. And now you're talking about alignment. So let's talk about what alignment means, right. So you've just kind of given us an overview, but that means when I go up and say, hello, right from the get go, that you're looking for alignment. Yes?

Ron Tomlian: 14:30

Yeah, alignment. In other words, I think this is the person I want to speak to, and the type of person or the type of organisation that I'm looking for to build my network, but I've got to find out about that. I've got an idea beforehand, but this is about finding out whether there is good connection. Or potential for connection.

Brenton Gowland: 14:52

It's about finding alignment between both of you.

Ron Tomlian: 14:55

And if you've done your research and you know who you want to speak to you have some information about what they're personally are about, or what their organisation is all about. So you will have some ideas on how to start conversations with them about what they'll be interested in. Because what you're you're doing is not telling about you, you're seeking information about them, and the type of problems they have, or the type of things they're interested in, so that you can see whether there's that potential for connection and real value exchange between the two people.

Brenton Gowland: 15:31

Yeah great. So if we're trying to find alignment, the real practical things that we can put into, or that we can actually share with our listeners is the fact that if you're trying to find alignment, you start with questions. Yeah. Because you're basically doing research, on the person.

Ron Tomlian: 15:45

You're using your ears, not your mouth.

Brenton Gowland: 15:47

So you go in with questions that open up a conversation.

Ron Tomlian: 15:51

That's right. And it's not closed questions. It's questions about who they are, who their organisation is, finding and seeking information about their perspectives. So that's that whole thing about genuine curiosity.

Brenton Gowland: 16:07

Yeah.

Ron Tomlian: 16:07

If you are genuinely curious about this person, and you should be, then what are the sorts of questions you're going to be asking to get information that helps you understand who they are, who their organisation is? And what's important to them?

Brenton Gowland: 16:19

Yeah, and those questions don't have to be complex. They everyone asked that question, what do you do? And that's a very normal, open into a conversation. I personally hate it. Because I tend to avoid, if you go to an event, it's really simple. Last night.

Ron Tomlian: 16:35

It's lazy. That's what it is.

Brenton Gowland: 16:37

Oh it's terribly lazy. Last night, the biggest thing on my mind was actually, so tell us about the event. What did you think of the event? And you guys up for an award, blah, blah, blah? Did this happen? Did that happen? So you've got some common ground, and you eventually get to that part, I always try and ask questions about the other person until they ask questions about me. I don't give up anything about what I do until they actually start asking me about that.

Ron Tomlian: 17:01

And look, I've got to say, in my experience, a lot of people will never get to that point.

Brenton Gowland: 17:06

That's true. But then you weed out the people who are not going to work anyway, or not align.

Ron Tomlian: 17:11

If you're doing this well. In my opinion, you are continually asking questions. And you know, I've always said to people try this, when people ask you questions about yourself, just as an experiment and exercise, say,"Well, you know, that's not anywhere near as interesting as what you were talking about. Can we continue talking about that?"

Brenton Gowland: 17:30

Yeah I like that.

Ron Tomlian: 17:30

And it's a good look, that it's not about deflecting, but what you'll find is, you can do this quite easily if you're genuinely interested in what people are talking about.

Brenton Gowland: 17:39

So this is where the alignment comes in. Because alignment is asking questions, to basically learn about the other person, their business, what they do. And we can probably come up with some questions at some point and put them into a podcast, we might do a podcast, maybe at the end of this series about the kind of questions you can ask, because I think that's important. And just to make sure that you can open up conversations and so forth. Can't do it on the spot right now. We'll get to it. But you asked those questions to learn. Because when you then do learn the way you actually respond, like someone might say, you know, oh, you know, blah, blah, blah, I'm doing this project where we've got a bit of a challenge where this, that and the other, and you might not have talked about your business, but that gives me the opportunity to go, wow, that's really interesting, because we've worked on a similar project over here. And this is how we solve that. And you haven't mentioned what you do. You've just, you've just brought some real alignment by that statement. Because the more you learn, the more it gives you the ability to go, Oh, that's interesting, because we've done something similar. Well, this has happened and then all of a sudden, it's like, tell me more about that. What is it you do again? Oh, I didn't ask you before. Funny. That's interesting. Wow. I remember and I, It's really interesting. We were in Queensland at a networking event with, again, defence recently, there's a lot of defence stuff that I go to, obviously, but this guy came up to me, and I won't tell you his name, because I saw him again last night, but he said to me,"You're not going to like me, I'm your competitor." That was the best intro ever. And we just had a laugh. And then we talked through the rest of the evening and so forth. And at the end, he said to me, You know what, I want to come talk to you guys on your stand tomorrow, because I want to give you overflow work. We never once really talked about working together. We just talked he talked about the challenges he had, what we were doing, I shared some information. We talked about football. All those kinds of things. But we found alignment through all sorts of other different conversations we were having, because we didn't take ourselves overly seriously right. There was no pressure on our backs. And yeah, that conversation has continued.

Ron Tomlian: 19:44

It comes down to the truism, and it's been accredited to a....

Brenton Gowland: 19:48

I love that word truism!

Ron Tomlian: 19:49

Yep truism? There's been a...

Brenton Gowland: 19:50

It's so advertising.

Ron Tomlian: 19:51

It's been attributed to a number of different people but I finally found the source the first person who said it was Teddy Roosevelt.

Brenton Gowland: 19:59

Really?!

Ron Tomlian: 19:59

Yeah. And he said this, people don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care.

Brenton Gowland: 20:06

Oh that's great!

Ron Tomlian: 20:07

And, you know, the truth of the matter is I don't want to talk to people who don't care about me.

Brenton Gowland: 20:13

Yeah.

Ron Tomlian: 20:14

And so first, you've got to establish that there is a level of interaction or level of connection, before they want to find out what you do.

Brenton Gowland: 20:22

Well that's all about finding alignment, because you need to know you care. Like I've had bad experiences as well where we've rubbed each other the wrong way. And we know that we don't care about each other. So it's not gonna work. But you're 100% Correct. It's so many different levels. But yeah, people open up when they know you're genuine.

Ron Tomlian: 20:38

Yeah. And, and again, that comes back to that mindset of genuine curiosity and seeking to find that connection that you can have with another person, and seeing whether they will add to your network. And you'll add to theres.

Brenton Gowland: 20:53

Yep. So once you've found alignment with someone. So that indicates non lazy attitude and a quality of conversation, not a quantity of conversation, right. So I target five people in a room of 800. Seriously, rather than 70 people in a room of 800 and have these really racy conversations with people that get you nowhere but I have five really deep conversations. You'll end up in an event, you'll go back to another venue afterwards, generally, and continue the conversation. Fantastic. But those quality of conversations mean when you follow up the next day, and it's funny, we're doing this at nine o'clock in the morning, everyone. So I've actually got business cards sitting there that people want follow ups today. So I'll be doing that today.

Ron Tomlian: 21:35

And follow up is all about, you've put the time in, you've put the effort in to talk to someone, establish connection, see that there's value on both sides in having further conversations. It means not stopping there, it means doing the work that will continue that conversation afterwards. And that could be as simple as sending that person an email.

Brenton Gowland: 21:58

Okay. So you've done the research, you've targeted the people you want to speak to, you've gone to the event or you've gone to the meeting, or you've rung people on the phone, whatever it is. And if you've targeted, let's say your target was five people in a room of 800. But you had really good conversations, you found alignment with three of those, because you did your research. Well, that's actually pretty good, right. So I've got three people to follow up the next day, let's talk about follow up. What do we do?

Ron Tomlian: 22:24

Well, like I said.

Brenton Gowland: 22:25

What are the important things?

Ron Tomlian: 22:26

It's about maintaining that conversation beyond, if you find that as an example, that a person is particularly interested in the latest ideas on recruitment, you might have some information on recruitment that they'll find valuable.

Brenton Gowland: 22:40

Yep.

Ron Tomlian: 22:41

So it's about genuinely finding what the connection was, and how you can add value to that person. Whether it's an article, I like to do that, because I do have a number of articles, and I'm continually researching things that are of interest to business people, it could be that you talked about someone who might be of mutual interest. So you do an email connection with them, it might be that they were seeking information on a particular service that someone you know, provides.

Brenton Gowland: 23:11

That's interesting. So if we're talking about quality of relationship, so we've talked about in the past that you must follow up, you know, really within 24 to 48 hours, I would say 24. And you got to make contact with those people. And we've said in the past that you might have X amount of people that you're going to follow up with, but three of them, you might call and a couple of them, you might just send emails to because you know that you've got their business cards, but it's not you haven't gone into that depth. But what we're talking about here is the quality of the follow up as well as the timeliness of the follow up. So you're talking about doing in a sense, some work and going out and, and finding something that's of interest to people and giving them that value. So the follow up includes the value. So one of the people I was speaking to last night, we ended up talking about the podcast, because luckily enough, some people came and talked to me about that last night at this event. And they're actually looking for a business development person. I said, Well, we've just done a series on that. And there's an episode about how to identify quality BD people and this person was like, I really want to listen to that. So today, I'm following them up with that, and then booking your lunch. So I've got that all written down to that point. That's easy. But you're talking about going out and doing a little bit of work and finding the materials for these people that will further the relationship really.

Ron Tomlian: 24:20

Yep. And I suppose spending some time reflecting as well. Talk about that for a minute. That's interesting. Yeah, I think one of the problems that we've gotten this very hectic world that we live in, is that we don't provide ourselves enough time or schedule ourselves enough time to reflect so after an event, maybe the next day is reflecting how could I be of use to that person? How can I demonstrate through our connection that I can be of use to that individual. That they want to have me in their network. And I've talked about a couple of ways articles, connections with other people, information about services that you might not provide, but you're aware of. Connections with other organisations, whatever it is reflecting on, well, where could this person sit my network? And how can I be a value to them to start with? Because I think a lot of times when we network, we think about, well, how is that person going to be a value to me? And I think you've got to start with an idea that how am I going to be a value to them to demonstrate there's something in this for them to start with.

Brenton Gowland: 25:27

Well there is a principle, the principle is give, give, give, ask. That is an obvious weight imbalance, right? If you want to be able to have influence you got to give to people because you got to earn it.

Ron Tomlian: 25:41

That's right. That's right.

Brenton Gowland: 25:42

And, you know, we talk about whether it's part of the reason we do the podcast, because we want to give to people and earn the ability to be able to then do other things and work with people and, and help them in other ways. But sometimes you really do, you got to give people value.

Ron Tomlian: 25:57

And it comes down to, most people want to try before they buy, if you like, and belong before they believe.

Brenton Gowland: 26:05

Yeah.

Ron Tomlian: 26:06

And it really comes down to it. That's the way we've been conditioned in our society, is that I want to see what I'm getting before I get it.

Brenton Gowland: 26:15

Yep.

Ron Tomlian: 26:15

So if I'm going to connect with this person, well I'm going to establish a relationship with them, I've got to see that there's value in it for me. And that's, that's normal.

Brenton Gowland: 26:22

Yeah they have my best interest in mind.

Ron Tomlian: 26:25

So I think you've got to demonstrate that to start with, the more you can find ways to do that and follow up with these people to better the chance of establishing a relationship, developing your network in that way.

Brenton Gowland: 26:38

Yeah. Okay. So again, just recapping, so we've done, we've found our purpose. So we've defined our purpose for networking. That was two episodes ago. Last episode, we spoke about planning and mapping your network, sheduling your activities, and then preparing to do those activities. And this week, we spoke about the doing, and the doing is summed up by Research, Target, Align, and Follow-up. And I might change that to Find Alignment, Research, Target, Find Alignment, and then Follow-up, because I like that kind of better.

Ron Tomlian: 27:11

Okay.

Brenton Gowland: 27:11

Because it denotes inquiry, but I think if you do remember these things, because these are, Ron and I always have a bit of a workshop before we do these podcasts. And I was saying to Ron, that this is the kind of stuff that it comes naturally to me now, but oh, boy, it didn't come naturally to me when I started doing this. And we'll talk about that with the review and improve part. But, which is our next episode. Yeah, yeah, but it becomes really intrinsic, when you embed these things in your mind. And it comes down to mindset, like we've spoken about in the past. Because if you have these things in your mind, there is also a comfort in understanding how relationships are formed in a networking sense, because it, it helps you understand the steps that are involved in building those relationships to end up in a working relationship.

Ron Tomlian: 27:57

And that takes time.

Brenton Gowland: 27:58

Oh, yeah. So these four things, if you keep them in your mind, or if you actually do them as you go out and prepare to network will really serve you well. Do your research, target who you want to talk to, for whatever reasons, you can always deviate a bit if you've if you're in the room, because you know, Ron was talking about going into a roomful of people, party research might be talking to people, well, you might talk to one of the people that you've got on your target list, and they might go you should really meet such and such over here. Well, that's a live kind of piece of research, you still won't look lazy, because your of purpose. I always love those events where that happens. You say "Well, can you introduce me to them?"

Ron Tomlian: 28:37

And then when you're talking to people Find Alignment and Follow-up?

Brenton Gowland: 28:40

Absolutely. So four things, again, like we just said, those things will help you really well. And as you said, next week, we're going to be talking about...

Ron Tomlian: 28:49

Reviewing your results. Because there's no point doing all this stuff. And then just saying, what's kind of interesting, you've got to see what works, what doesn't, and that's about having some type of metrics, some type of what does success look like and we'll talk about that next week.

Brenton Gowland: 29:05

Well, and that's very interesting, because like I just said that when I started this, it didn't come naturally. But I had to understand what was going on. What was my baseline, what was I actually like to understand how I needed to change, which is where as you said the review process comes in.

Ron Tomlian: 29:20

Good. Well in that case, its bye from me.

Brenton Gowland: 29:23

And bye from me. We will see you in two weeks time as we move towards Christmas and things get festive. So we hope you have a great festive couple of weeks and we'll see you soon.

Ron Tomlian: 29:35

And enjoy your networking.

Brenton Gowland: 29:36

Enjoy your networking.